Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Time Passes, Love Remains

This blog is being created for many reasons. My hope is that Timmy's life will inspire people to remember what's truly important. Sometimes I ache for my little boy so deeply I find it difficult to inhale. I am able to take that next breath because I know I took the time to cherish his chubby wrists, sparkling eyes and joyful squeals. At times the laundry was abundant and if ever stranded in our car we could have lived off crumbs alone for several weeks. Many things remained on my "to do list" but I never missed an opportunity to play peek-a-boo or snap far too many pictures well beyond nap time.

Timmy was a family decision. It was on our wedding anniversary that Tony told me that he thought it would be a great time to have the baby the kids and I had been wanting. I was so touched and happy I cried for a week!

We all chose his name together. Of course, it had to be a name beginning with the letter "T'. Timothy was our first and only choice. Max had to be his middle name because it reflected how much we all loved and wanted this little boy. On April 18th, 2005 Tyler, Talia and Tony were in the room to welcome our precious Timmy.

Sometimes I wonder if we knew somehow that we had to cherish and preserve every moment we had with Timmy. Perhaps it was because Tony and I were older parents this time around and we knew how quickly things pass. Whatever the reason we never took even the smallest moments for granted. We used to joke that when Timmy went to school he was going to expect everyone to treat him like a rock star because that was how he was treated at home. Camera flashes were constantly going off and there were cheers with every ball that went into his basketball hoop.

I am so deeply grateful to our friends and family that always took the time to love Timmy. Most people in our circle were done with having babies and their lives were busy with school, PTO meetings, work and endless sporting activities. However, it never stopped anyone from passing him around to be admired on sidelines, bouncing him on a lap during art history meetings or sending him a book that was loved by their own child. These wonderful people made Timmy's life feel like it was kissed with magic. These are the same individuals that still have his pictures up in their home, remember his birthday and help try to sooth us on the date we lost our beautiful boy. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

My hope is to add stories, memories and thoughts about Timmy at a pace that isn't too emotionally draining. I welcome people to share. Over the past two years whenever someone shares a picture or story I feel like I've been given a piece of my child that I didn't have before. They are cherished.


To Timmy, Love Mama
If I grow old and you stay young
Remember me my precious one
One day in Heaven I will hold you tight
My beautiful jewel that gave me light
Yesterday, today, tomorrow.....Forever your Mama I will be
That is my promise to you through eternity


Susan said...

You are truely amazing Tiffanie. A very strong woman.. I look up to you more than words can express. To have the strength to put your words on paper (or on the computer)to share your beautiful Timmy with all of us.
Thank you for being such an inspiration. It makes me know and see that time really does heal all wounds. Even when you are touched with the worst tragedy a family could suffer, there is still hope. I wish I had your strength. My hearts goes out to you and your beautiful family. Love and prayers from one mom to another who truely understands your loss, Susan Buckler

Felicia said...

Timmy's picture and my beautiful glass Timmy ball sit on a shelf right next to the last light I turn off in the house at night. Each night (for almost the past two and a half years!... How could that be?!) as I turn that light off and say "Goodnight sweet boy", his little face reminds me that no matter what, today was a good day and tomorrow I can try again to be the amazing mama that Timmy, Tyler, Talia, Boo and Turner have. xoxo

Tiffanie Quatraro said...

I don't know what i did to deserve such wonderful people in my life. Your words mean so much!

Susan said...

By just being YOU! My life is a better because of our mean a lot to me. hugs to you, my friend!