Thursday, August 27, 2009

To Timmy, Love Dad


I know I have not been the father to you since your death that I would have been in life.  I’m sorry for the lack of tears I have cried and the silence I have maintained.  Losing   you was shocking and so wrong.  It goes deeper than my heart is allowing me to feel and is bigger than my brain can master.

What I know is that you were a special and amazing little boy and I feel the loss of the relationship we were forming and the person who you would have become.  I feel you have given us a glimpse of that person in Little Buddy, as he is as spectacular in his way, as you were in yours.  I thank you for that – I thank you as a father and a husband for bringing that joy back into our lives.  

I thank you for watching over our family and making sure we are together and safe.  I want you to know that I love knowing you are very much a part of what we do and who we are.  I want you to know that you give me courage to be better than I am.

Timmy, I want you to know that you are my son and always will be and that I look forward to the day we meet again.  I look forward to being the dad I know I was going to be, to a son as remarkable as you. 

I love and miss you very much,


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